The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
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