I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
