i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
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the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
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The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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