Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Randomize
