I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."