I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Randomize