I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
she smelled like a LAN party
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
