How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
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