JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
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