yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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