he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
