guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Randomize
