after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
