um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
