She went from zero to smokin in five shots
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
I don't think brook has ever known best
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
