Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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