I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize