I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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