to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
