I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
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