she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
