he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
