So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize