I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Randomize
