Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Pants 0. Shit 1.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
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