ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Randomize
