Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
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Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
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You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
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