I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Randomize