you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
