Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
