I wannas sexs uuuuu
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Randomize
