Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize