Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
