Yo dont text me then not text me
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
