omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
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