Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I bet he comes in French.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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