Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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