He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
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