Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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