Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
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gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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