dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
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