this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
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