I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
this is an emotional support booty call
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
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