she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
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