she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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