i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
I have fence marks all over my body
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
