"it" just moved
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
