But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
