look no pants
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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