um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
