you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Randomize
